Musings of a Music Guy

A Very Real Fear

2010-03-08T14:46:00.002-06:00

I'm reading through the book of Judges. If this book was a movie it would have to be directed by Quentin Tarantino. It is bloody and brutal and at some points, a little difficult to read. And then Gideon comes along. The guy starts as a sneak, trying to hide food from the enemy. Then he goes to battle and wins. Not by his own doing, the army he was fighting got freaked out and massacred each other. Then he gets a little cocky and takes things into his own hands and wins. And the story starts to go sour.

"And Gideon made an ephod of [the spoils] and put it in his city, in Ophrah. And all Israel whored after it there, and it became a snare to Gideon and to his family." Judges 8.27

He forgot where his success came from and believed the hype in himself. I have a lot of friends that want to go into ministry and the fear for all of us is that we will succumb to success just like Gideon. That we will cause our people to whore themselves out to a variety of things. Evangelicals do a great job of spotting the big stuff. Abortion is evil, corrupted sexuality is ruining families. But I think that the biggest fight that pastors overlook is to disciple flocks and teach followers of Christ that we don't follow a moral teacher. We follow the Savior of humanity. Our morality is a response to, and overflow of what Christ has done in us. We must teach the death and resurrection of Christ as the redemption for our sins. The victory of Christ in his rising brings us to life. Without this, we are left with morality for the sake of morality. Not morality for the sake of proclaiming Christ as the King and reconciler of every broken thing. The Holy Spirit restores. We must proclaim to our people that this work was done by God, not our actions. If we don't, the danger becomes obeying rules under our own power and making an idol out of our behavior.

The story of Gideon ends like this, "As soon as Gideon died, the people of Israel turned again and whored after the Baals and made Baal-berith their god." Judges 8.33

What will our people do when we leave? Act nice to people, or find their hope in Christ alone and go forth proclaiming His name in all nations.

It's been far too long...

2010-02-04T18:02:00.002-06:00

One of my passions is writing. I write a lot in my journal (read man diary) but it's been quite some time since I've put any thoughts into the interwebs.

The thought that has been driving me lately comes from Revelation 21.5. The verse reads "And he who was sitting on the throne said, 'Behold, I am making all things new.' And he said, 'Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true.'" I don't really want to get into a massive eschatological discussion, I'll just say that I believe Christ makes things new now, and some day the whole earth will rest in this newness.

This is such a beautiful thought! And what is even more amazing is to see this come true. I see this in my own life as I die to myself daily, but I see it in people around me constantly. I am marrying a woman in a few months that the Holy Spirit has used to remind me of this daily. She loves Jesus so much that it intimidates me but makes me press into Him all the more. The Holy Spirit has made so many things new in her life that, quite honestly makes me jealous of her. I would love to tell you her story, but that is best left for her to do. Someone else prompt her to write it down. She won't listen to me.

Weddings and Kidnappings

2009-09-12T14:12:00.002-05:00

So I'm in seminary now. Very cool. Not cool on the free time front.

This blog will basically be a recap of the summer and to put me in the right frame of mind, Dave Matthews Band's "Big Whiskey and the Groo Grux King" is playing through the earbuds. *Side note, my amazing and beautiful lady friend Reagan Elaine Faught got this album for me on vinyl for my birthday last week. I've been telling people for months, I WAY out-punted my coverage on this deal. Girl is incredible. Side note over* It's a great album. Fun summer listening.

This was a summer absolutely filled with bittersweet beauty. Two of my very best friends got married (not to each other, that would have really changed the dynamic of our friendship). Both were great ceremonies and prayers and blessings go to Kevin and Kelly and Matt and Dana. You fellas did well.

I loved seeing these couples enter into covenant with each other and God, but I must be transparent and say that selfishly I'm glad they were wed because it brought friends back from all over the country. One of my favorite things to do in life is to sit back with friends and reflect on what God did in our lives together and to see what God is doing now. Some of the situations aren't easy, some are joyful new experiences but it is so very encouraging to see how God is working in the lives of the men that God put in my life as a 19 year old kid. I pray for these men often and Paul's words in Philippians 1 reverberate often. I look forward to sitting around at 70 and acknowledging our Father and His blessings.

In the midst of all the nuptials, my favorite couple of all time, The Bullards, moved across the pond to Cambridge, England. Meet these people. Do what it takes. Go to Cambridge. They will probably let you stay with them. I grew up in a house of hospitality, but these two take it to the next level. These next few years will be an adventure, but I'm kind of ready to do life together. Growing up is tough, but worth it I'm sure.

The summer ended with me getting tazed. Several times. My girl planned a surprise birthday/going away party and left it up to my brother Garrett, David Thompson and Kyle Forgety to get me there. They chose kidnapping. Or as Kyle called it, oldmannapping. It seemed a fitting end to a great summer, being dragged kicking and screaming to get there, but loving the end result.

How the Mighty Fall

2009-08-06T16:28:00.001-05:00

I was just listening to the Hillsong album This Is Our God, and came to the song "Healer." It's a great song of the power of the Holy Spirit and of how our God still heals today. Then I went to YouTube to check out if anyone had covered it or if there were any good videos of Hillsong playing it. What I came across was a video with the tag "Healer (Cancer Faked) Mike Gugliemucci." Naturally, I had to check it out.

It seems that Mike G had written this song as a prayer to God to heal him of the cancer that was ravaging his body. Only, he didn't have cancer. He was addicted to porn and the effects of this secret sin were so strong that they had wrecked havoc on his body.

I must confess here, publicly, that my first response was self-righteous judgment. I immediately decided that I would never use this song in a corporate setting because how could God use a song that was bred out of a sinful mind. Then I thought about myself. See, we never think about ourselves when self-righteousness creeps up. (Never honestly think about ourselves, I should say.)

Hearing this man's story makes the song even more powerful. God is our healer. I absolutely think that He still heals our physical bodies, but what is even more miraculous is that He heals our diseased souls. How beautiful is this! He has taken ugly, horrific memories of ugly, horrific sin in my life and driven them out. This comes from years of begging and pleading that He restore my mind and He has. He still does.

I also want to say that all of us are capable of doing the very thing that Mike G did. None of us are above this. If you think you are, may God have mercy on you, and I pray that your fall from grace is swift. I have seen this happen to friends and acquaintances in ministry and I am not too naive to think that it won't happen again. My prayer in my life is that I continue to surround myself with godly men that will point out the filth in my life. (A stronger word goes there, but we'll keep this PG rated.) I also set up very practical boundaries to protect my character. I am an outspoken advocate for Covenant Eyes and will never have a computer that isn't equipped with this software.

May humility reign in our hearts.

"For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but the one who humbles himself will be exalted.” Luke 18.14

Here is the link to Mike's story.

UPDATE
According to this website, the song was actually written as a prayer to heal Mike from His addiction. The way God heals is not always comfortable, but He is faithful to hear our prayers from heaven.

Rich Rulers

2009-07-31T15:53:00.003-05:00

"Though the fig tree should not blossom,
nor fruit be on the vines,
the produce of the olive fail
and the fields yield no food,
the flock be cut off from the fold
and there be no herd in the stalls,
yet I will rejoice in the Lord;
I will take joy in the God of my salvation."

These words come from Habakkuk, a prophet from the people of Israel around the year 600 BCE. This book is absolutely fascinating and I would encourage anyone to really put some time into studying this arrogant, angry man whose heart is softened by some stern rebuking. (I must admit, I often see Habakkuk when I look in the mirror.)

This passage intrigues and concerns me at the same time. It's the passion and response that I want, but is it the response I have? See, the church in America is rife with the so-called "Prosperity Gospel," even in corners that often don't claim to hold that particular doctrine. How many times are we going to say or sing "God Bless America" before we realize that He has? Maybe we should instead be saying "God let us turn our blessings back to you by giving ourselves away." I know this probably won't make a great, catchy tune or fit nicely on a bumper sticker, but I think we've got enough bumper stickers.

My fear for the church in America is that we, much like the rich ruler, are doing a decent job of keeping up our morality, but we're losing our souls to our stuff.

22 When Jesus heard this, he said to him, “One thing you still lack. Sell all that you have and distribute to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow me.” 23 But when he heard these things, he became very sad, for he was extremely rich. 24 Jesus, seeing that he had become sad, said, “How difficult it is for those who have wealth to enter the kingdom of God! 25 For it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich person to enter the kingdom of God.” Luke 18.22-25

This young ruler kept the law. He did a great job of keeping the law. But he was losing his soul. I've heard this taught by pastors that leave the story right here. Give everything you own away and God will love you for it. But that leads us into another danger, that if we do enough good deeds and give enough to the poor or stand up for the marginalized that we will be saved.

Those who heard it said, “Then who can be saved?” 27 But he said, “What is impossible with men is possible with God.” 28 And Peter said, “See, we have left our homes and followed you.” 29 And he said to them, “Truly, I say to you, there is no one who has left house or wife or brothers or parents or children, for the sake of the kingdom of God, 30 who will not receive many times more in this time, and in the age to come eternal life.” 18.26-29

The point of this story is that it is God who saves us. He reaches out and woos us in such a way that everything becomes a shadow to Him. When Jesus and his disciples walk away from this incident, he tells them that he will die. THIS is what saves us. THIS is the crux of the gospel. That neither our stuff, nor our good deeds will save us. Only the blood of Christ. Christ is our salvation.

"I will take joy in the God of my salvation."

Revolution

2009-06-24T14:59:00.002-05:00

I just read David Brooks, an op-ed writer for the New York Times quote Michael McFaul, a democracy expert on the National Security Council. "In retrospect, all revolutions seem inevitable. Beforehand, all revolutions seem impossible."

We are witnessing what I believe to be the collapse of an autocratic government in Iran. I don't know that this will happen in the next few days, for that matter in the next few weeks or even months, but I do see this government collapsing sometime soon. Watching this has intrigued me to no end, but at the same time has brought much sorrow as the death toll continues to climb. Revolution is a very violent creature.

Seeing this quote brought to mind the Gospel. This is what the Gospel is. A revolution of the heart. A violent upheaval of the soul. It is complete selfishness given over to the death of self. For many, this seems impossible. For the disciple of Jesus, it is inevitable. "And I am sure of this, that He Who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ." Philippians 1.6

Brilliance

2009-05-20T12:04:00.003-05:00

I'm reading the book Evil and the Justice of God by one of my favorite authors, N. T. Wright. It's a very weighty book, and to be quite honest, I need a full pot of coffee nearby when I crack it open. I love to read books like this. I don't understand everything in it, especially on the first pass, but the more I read, the easier it gets to comprehend. And the stuff I do comprehend, brilliant.

Here is a snippet that I could understand. To set the stage, Wright is discussing the necessity of the cross for the atonement of sin. He discusses the inherent depravity of man and how Post-Modernism goes against Modernism and it's high view of man's inherant goodness. Which leads me to his explanation of God's response to our depravity.

"What the Gospels offer is not a philosophical explanation of evil, what it is or why it's there, not a set of suggestions for how we might adjust our lifestyles so that evil will mysteriously disappear from the world, but the story of an event in which the living God deals with it. This raises for us all the echoes of the ancient stories of the exodus from Egypt and the return from the exile in Babylon, and it is no surprise that the earliest Christians, both the New Testament writers and others on into the liturgical traditions of the second, third and fourth centuries, reached for imagery from both these events to explain what had happened on the cross. This, they are saying, is how God rescues his people from the evil in which they are trapped; and he does so through the suffering of Israel's representative, just as with the martyrs, only so much more so. This is what it looks like when YHWH says, as in Exodus 3.7-8, "I have heard the cry of my people, and I have come down to set them free." This is what it looks like when YHWH says, "Behold, my servant." As Isaiah says later (Isaiah 59), it was no messenger, no angel, but his own presence that saved them; in all their affliction he was afflicted. And the result of it all is that the covenant is renewed; sins are forgiven; the long night of sorrow, exile and death is over and the new day has dawned.

"The Gospels thus tell the story, centrally and crucially, which stands unique in the world's great literature, the world's religious theories and visions: the story of the Creator God taking responsibility for what has happened to creation, bearing the weight of its problems on his own shoulders. As Sydney Carter put it in one of his finest songs, "It's God they ought to crucify, instead of you and me." Or, as one old evangelistic tract put it, the nations of the world got together to pronounce judgment on God for all the evils in the world, only to realize with a shock that God had already served his sentence."

This is the Gospel, the Good News. God saw that what He had created went wrong. The law was a shadow of the form of salvation, but our loving Father knew the only real remedy. So He sent Christ. We cannot defeat evil. We war against it, physically and spiritually, but we cannot defeat it. That job has been done. This leads us to what can be our only response, worship. And this is why I love my job, to lead people in our response to the death of evil through the death of our Creator.

My Prayer Lately

2009-05-06T10:06:00.002-05:00

So I've been studying in the OT a bit lately. I must be honest, it's because of the tv show "Kings." The show is great and is loosely based on the life of David, of David and Goliath fame. I was watching the show and thinking that I had no idea who most of these characters were and feeling like a complete moron for being Biblically illiterate.

I jumped into 2 Samuel to study the life of David as king and quickly discovered that I should have started a bit earlier to understand this deeply complicated figure. It was like picking up a novel in chapter 12. Never start a book on chapter 12. Start with chapter one. (I believe many Bible readers are guilty of this, myself leading the way, but this is another post for another time.) I jumped back to 1 Samuel and began my journey.

I read about Eli and his wicked sons Hophni and Phinehas (great names) who were noted as wicked chiefly because they basically stole from the members of the congregation and made the people sick of giving. (Should be a dire warning to those in ministry.) God tells Eli that his sons will die in battle because of their sin. And they do.

But this is where the story gets interesting. Eli hears of the death of his sons but immediately asks about the ark. The ark was taken by the Philistines and upon hearing this, Eli fell from where he was sitting and broke his neck. Phinehas' wife heard the news of her husband's death and immediately asks about the ark. Upon hearing that it was taken, she prematurely gives birth to her child.

This blows my mind because it shows just how seriously the people of Israel took the presence of God and the serious nature of the sin in their lives. Do I do this? Never. The prayer that God would reveal the ugliness of my sin is not to wallow in self-loathing, it's to see the beauty of the atonement of the cross. Charles Spurgeon once said, "If your sin is small, your Savior will be small, but if your sin is great, then your Savior will be great." I want my Savior to be great. I don't want to see the cross just as a bloody mess. I want to see the cross as my payment of sin, which is great.

"My sin, o the bliss of this glorious thought
My sin, not in part, but the whole
Was nailed to the cross and I bare it no more
Praise the Lord
Praise the Lord, o my soul!"

June 2, 2009

2009-04-07T09:37:00.003-05:00

I haven't had much to say in a while, so I've turned into "that guy" whose blog sits at the bottom of the "followed blogs" list on some pages. I feel this must change. So......

The Dave Matthews Band will release their seventh studio album, "Big Whiskey and the Groogrux King," a name inspired by the late LeRoi Moore, long-time sax player for DMB. I am incredibly excited about this album, having heard just a couple of snippets. That being said, I'm incredibly nervous and sad about this release.

This is the last studio album to feature LeRoi. The band had been recording the album for the last few years so they were able to use some of that to build into songs.

Rob Cavallo is the producer of the album and this is where I get nervous. You see, Cavallo is the mastermind behind behind pretty much all of Green Day's albums. Awesome. The guy who produced "Shenanigans" will be producing this album.

But I have faith. DMB will always be one of my favorite groups so my hope sustains that this will be an album full of heartache and joy.

I Have Found...

2009-03-03T11:45:00.001-06:00

The funniest thing on the internet. Your welcome.

Our Fallen World

2009-02-17T08:31:00.002-06:00

We live in a fallen world. This is very evident when we see the horrors of the thriving slave industry that lurks under and above ground. It's evident in the faces of those that are marred in debt and see hope only in economic stability. It's evident in the conversations we have with loved ones wrestling with the sins of their fathers.

It became evident to me again this morning when my homeless pal, George came in the coffee shop sans his grinning, content eyes. Someone had broken into his camp site, a second story eve at a local church, and stolen his pack containing all of his writings from his travels over the last twenty years.

I love to write and value my journals more than almost any of my possessions. These were his possessions. All of them. My heart really is broken for my buddy George.

Sometimes it's the seemingly small or insignificant wrongs that evoke my sense of justice the most.

Why Do I Freak Out?

2009-02-11T08:09:00.003-06:00

I've been listening to Jon Foreman a lot lately. I've also been thinking about my future a lot. One stirs my soul, the other robs me of my joy. See, the thing is, when I think about my future I don't see the beauty and mystery wrapped in my choices and the sovereignty of my God, who loves me. I choose instead to focus on the unknown and dwell in my worry and fret over things that are non-issues right now.

I don't mean to sound redundant to anyone who has read this blog before, but music soothes my soul. Different bands bring about different emotions. Robbie Seay gives me hope. Patty Griffin makes me reflect. Travis makes me joyful. She & Him makes me smile (for various reasons). Jon Foreman, he calms my spirit.

I think it's the way he just sings scripture. One of my favorite songs right now is "Your Love is Strong." The song comes from Matthew 6 and a couple of other places, but I just want to focus on this verse because this is what I've been saying to myself over and over.

I look out the window
The birds are composing
Not a note is out of tune
Or out of place
I look at the meadow
And stare at the flowers
Better dressed than any girl
On her wedding day

So why do I worry?
Why do I freak out?
God knows what I need
You know what I need

So I leave you with this. Jon Foreman performing "Your Love is Strong." This video is seven minutes long, but it's seven minutes well spent. The video won't show on my Facebook so just click on the "View Original Post" link and check it out.

By the way, I would pay large amounts of money to be at a show like this.

Creater's Block

2009-01-30T07:46:00.002-06:00

I have nothing groundbreaking to write about. Not that I have ever written anything groundbreaking to begin with... I do enjoy writing, though. I just haven't felt the creativity flowing lately. I'll blame it on the ice, which is everywhere, especially the front steps of our house. Yes, I fell like an old man missing his cane. It was dark so I don't think anyone saw. That's a good thing because there was no playing with that fall. No way to look cool after that.

I digress... I haven't felt creative and that frustrates me because I'm surrounded by very creative people. I also try to be well acquainted with culture so I read and listen to music constantly. When I do this I'm inspired to create.

A new album "dropped" as the kids say, this week by the band Fiction Family. I will tell you right now that this album will be in my top three albums of 2009. Incredible stuff. Even with all this amazing music around me I feel very lazy in my creativity. Oh well. I believe this all comes from God so I ask for patience and I move on listening to and watching my creative friends. I'm not bitter or anything...

Listmania

2009-01-18T20:45:00.000-06:00

I love lists. Top ten lists, top fifty lists, whatever, I can't get enough of them. So I thought I would venture into the list world with my own set of lists. What up. I can do it too, Roger Ebert.

Keep in mind, these are all items that I experienced for the first time in '08. They may not have actually been released in said year.

Top 5 Books of 2008:

1. The Weight of Glory- C.S. Lewis
2. What's So Amazing About Grace- Phillip Yancey
3. All-Star Superman- Grant Morrison & Frank Quietly (Yeah, I read comic books. Please don't judge me.)
4. Surprised by Hope- N.T. Wright
5. Hate That Cat- Sharon Creech

Top 5 Films of 2008:
1. "The Dark Knight"
2. "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"
3. "Juno"
4. "No Country for Old Men"
5. "Wall-E"

Worst Film of 2008:
"Wanted"- I felt dirty when I left this film. This was not only the worst film of '08, it was the worst film of the ot's. Seriously.

Top 5 Albums of 2008:
1. "The Boy With No Name"- Travis
2. "1000 Kisses"- Patty Griffin
3. "Volume One"- She & Him
4. "The Bright Sadness"- Charlie Hall
5. "Where the Light Is"- John Mayer
6. "Viva La Vida"- Coldplay

I know there are 6 in the "Best Albums" category. All six were awesome. Listen to them.

Welp, those are my lists. Hope you enjoy.

Seasons

2009-01-12T08:24:00.002-06:00

In a two week span I had one of the greatest weeks of my life and one of the lowest two days of my life. It's interesting how life works that way. I had this beautiful week of rekindling friendships and cultivating new ones that have quickly become very important in my life.

Time was spent laughing at great stories, eating great food and looking forward to what God was doing in our lives. It was a glimpse of the Kingdom right in front of me. Heaven had collided with earth and for a brief moment it seemed that a veil had been pulled back and all the beauty of the world was right in front of me. Then the next week came along.

It was a difficult week for many of my friends and it seemed that all of our troubles were tied into the same category. Eventually, everything worked out, quite well, in my life and the pieces are beginning to come together for my friends as well.

I was discussing this strange turn of events with a great friend at the coffee shop and we began talking about this idea of life coming in seasons. That great work of wisdom from Solomon comes to mind in Ecclesiastes, when he lays out how life seems to rotate and move in such a way as to keep us on our toes.

So it leads me to conclude here, hold on. Hold on if life is ripping you apart. Know that on the other side of this dark time, there is light. Hold on if life is beautiful and nothing could be better. Enjoy this day and be grateful for this day with the full knowledge that on the other side of this day is a day full of strife. For those in the Kingdom, know that life is hard but it's worth the breathing.

Mystery

2008-12-24T20:41:00.002-06:00

I'm watching "It's a Wonderful Life," with the family. It's a beautiful time spent reflecting on a beautiful moment.

Living in our age, now, we can't truly appreciate the depth of the prophesy given to the Jews. Surely we can reflect on, and we must, as followers of Jesus praise God for the fulfillment of it, but I don't know that we can truly appreciate it.

Which is why we don't see the beauty of taking part in the Kingdom of God. I write this blog on this night for a reason. In the morning we will awake and we will celebrate that the Kingdom is here. The Kingdom is now. We've celebrated the Advent season and it all culminates in the morning. What a beautiful moment!

So may you, with your family and friends, celebrate this mysterious birth and remember that the Kingdom is now. Christ has come, Christ has died, Christ is risen and Christ will come again!

Blessings and Peace
Jared

Passions

2008-12-15T09:42:00.002-06:00

I know that I've written about this before, but it's one of my favorite subjects. And my last couple of blogs have been pretty weighty. I don't think that's a bad thing, just time to lighten things up a bit.

Music and coffee are two of my deepest passions. I believe them both to be gifts God wrapped up just for me. I could talk about either for hours on end. I'm a pretty passionate guy, so to be honest I could talk about a lot of things for hours on end.

That's the reason I love Wikipedia so much, it fills my arsenal of knowledge so I can hold conversations about other's passions, because that is another passion of mine, deep conversations. Stay with me here...

I love to talk to people about the things they love. I had a great conversation this weekend about coffee. Coffee. It was great! We talked about the love of the local coffee shop, the bitter taste of burnt beans from a national chain and the sweet science of mixing drinks.

I had another talk with someone last week about art. I know nothing about art but to hear this guy talk about it was beautiful.

My brother loves people. He talk about the intricacies of the human soul for hours. I get absolutely drawn in when he does this. For my sister, it's compassion. For anything. She cried in High School Musical. All three of them. Why? Because she hurts along with every other living thing that hurts. It's one of the most beautiful things I've seen, the way she loves.

I think it's beautiful the way our Creator has wired us. I think he's wired all of us to be passionate about something. The tragedy is, most people ignore this. They go about life living safely in hobbies when instead they could be living richly in passions. Don't walk through life. Chase after those things that drive your spirit.

This leads me to my next passion, stories. Tell me your story. What are you passionate about? What things light up your heart and stir your soul? Tell me! I want to know!

The Great Divorce

2008-12-12T09:05:00.002-06:00

I'm reading The Great Divorce again. I think this makes it the fifth reading of the C.S. Lewis classic. I love this book. It's one of Lewis' easier reads, in that it is only around a hundred pages long and the stories of the characters are all fairly self-contained.

This book makes me think. A lot. It's important to note that Lewis never says that this view of the heaven/hell relationship is theologically accurate, or that he even thinks that this is what it will look like. But it still makes me think.

It makes me think that the view of hell that we've gathered from Dante and other forms of mythology have snippets of truth, but they miss the biggest tragedy of hell. The absence of love. This is something that Lewis points out clearly in his book. It's also a theme of God and His words through Paul in Romans that "they were given over to dishonorable passions." This scares me more than the fire and brimstone.

This also goes back to the cross. It wasn't the physical beating, terrible as it was, that hurt Christ the most. What hurt Christ was the absence of the love of God when all the sin of the world was placed on Him. He had never felt shame. Now He felt all the shame of the world at once. All He had known was close community with the Father. Now that community was temporarily cut off.

As terrible as I think hell is, I don't think a fear of it is what should force people to follow Christ. See, I believe heaven is filled with people who love Christ passionately, not people who are scared of hell. There is a huge difference. Heaven is the opposite of hell. While hell is a place devoid of God's love, heaven is a place filled with love.

Giving this thought helps to drive my life. I want people to feel love. So I love here, now, in preparation for what is to come. At the same time, I believe many people choose hell daily by refusing to love. This should make Matthew 25 some of the most terrifying words in scripture. It drives me daily. Am I a sheep or a goat? Do I feed the hungry? Do I clothe the naked? Do I visit those imprisoned in life? Or do I bring hell to earth by ignoring the suffering around me?

Sex

2008-11-24T20:52:00.000-06:00

I call myself a Christian. This literally means that I have chosen to be a "Little Christ." I boldly and yet humbly believe this is the weightiest of all titles. This means I must die to myself daily. This also means that all who hold this title proudly must do the same.

I refuse to make this a fundamentalist rant because that is pointless and quite frankly, stupid. What this is, I'm not sure. I know that there is a grave issue that is not discussed often in church and is hijacked by people that carry the banner of Christ who breath words of death and not life. They condemn and do not show life. They are darkness in the midst of more darkness (but that's a blog for another time). This issue is the issue of sex.

Pornography is a $12 Billion business. Billion. That is more than pro baseball, football and basketball COMBINED.

More than the revenues of ABC, NBC and CBS COMBINED.

The Red Cross has an annual budget of $3.45 Billion.

Blood-Water Mission, an organization that digs water wells in Africa to promote health, which promotes education, which promotes information on the AIDS epidemic, runs on an annual budget of just under $1.5 Million.

Compassion International, an organization that allows people to work directly with individual children in third-world nations has an annual income of just under a quarter of a billion dollars.

The sex-slave industry is a $32 Billion industry.

More than Nike, Google and Starbucks COMBINED.

Here's my point, we live in a time where the way we spend our money could do more good in the world than any other time in history. We know this and yet, we spend it on sex. This is where it ties to my faith: I choose not to take a part of pornography for many reasons but this is the biggest- I refuse to be a cog in a deep systemic evil that plagues our world.

I know that this is a heart issue that goes deeper than just sex and I beg you not to read this as some self-righteous rant condemning the world as a terrible place. God created it. He called it good. God created sex. He tells us to have fun (look at Song of Songs). My plea is that you please see the world and the evils in the world and not neglect them. See the truth in Christ that He came to redeem the world. Take part in that. Give to some of the organizations that are desperately working to bring the world back to right.

Finally watch the trailer for this film. Then watch the film. Be aware of the world around you. And for those that carry the banner of Christ, carry it proudly and carry it in love. Join with Him and those that follow Him and be the change you want to see.

The Time's They Are A Changin'

2008-11-23T22:54:00.000-06:00

Well the time has come. Ada has been good to me but it's time to move on.

After weeks of seeking vision and direction for my life here, nothing ever clicked, no vision was given. Then I spent a weekend away with some very wise people, and an evening over coffee with another wise friend and I've decided to move to the great state of Texas.

All plans are tentative and I have no job, nor do I have a place to live, but I plan on going to seminary in Ft. Worth and being a part of a church that I admire quite a bit.

God is good and He will provide all that I need and I'm ready to see life in a new light.

Tainted Hope

2008-11-15T17:26:00.000-06:00

The truth is I've been trying to write this blog for the past hour. I wanted to write something clever about the status of the church or something insightful about my soul. Nothing seems to fit.

This weekend I heard a well-known speaker in Christian subculture say that if Jesus set up a church across town, he would have more attenders than Jesus. And it terrified him. They had made church good, but not life-sacrificing good.

I heard another speaker, also well-known, say that their church valued depth over width. Spiritual maturity over numbers.

I don't know what this means for me. I don't know what this means for the church at large. I just know that I've been going to conferences and retreats for over ten years (I'm a reformed church brat) and I've never heard this. It gives me hope. It scares the absolute crap out of me, but it gives me hope.

Beautifully Weary

2008-11-07T08:33:00.000-06:00

I'm exhausted. But its the good kind of exhaustion. The kind where you wake up but your eyelids refuse to part ways, and yet you just have to smile.

Last night was spend in some seriously weighty discourse (something I live for) covering everything from eschatology to the sovereignty/free will debate. It was great.

Last night took me back a few years. Back to my first couple of years of college where this was an almost nightly thing. Sitting in married student housing or the doughnut shop or the annex always forward to what lied ahead.

I'm not a college student anymore and those four hours of sleep are a lot tougher to recover from than they used to be. But here I sit, full of espresso, Robbie Seay singing about better days and beautifully weary. Life is good.

Awesomeness.

2008-11-06T00:01:00.000-06:00

It's Almost Over!!!

2008-10-30T21:54:00.001-06:00

I must say that I am quite ready for the political season to end. It's getting old.

Now, as I say that, I'm going back on it and posting something political. Hypocrite much? Yes.

This is a blog from John Piper on the reality of voting for Christ Followers. It's pretty interesting.

"Listen Through" Albums and My Indy Cred Strikeout

2008-10-07T13:51:00.001-05:00

Last night I picked up the Travis album, "The Boy With No Name." A few weeks ago I downloaded Charlie Hall's latest offering, "The Bright Sadness." Here's what these two albums have in common, I can type in the name in iTunes or open the album on my iPod and just let it run. This brings joy to my heart like little else.

I absolutely love the feeling of gambling on an album (as I did with Travis) or anxiously downloading an album (as I did with Chuck's) and coming out a winner knowing I came away with ten to fifteen songs that I won't soon tire of.

This doesn't happen often. I don't think of myself as a music snob because most of the bands I listen to, other people have heard of. And I love The Dave Matthews Band and John Mayer. Those are two huge strikes to my indy cred. The final strike would be that I listened to Creed constantly in high school and still rock out the "My Own Prison" album. So as you can see, I'm a bit of pop music fan despite my best efforts to conform. That being said, I still love finding new, or old albums that rock incredibly hard.

These two albums do that. Get them. Please. And anything by Patty Griffin. She also rocks in her own special way.

So those are two of my "listen through" albums. What are yours?

Glory

2008-09-08T19:18:00.000-05:00

I'm warning you right now, this will be a ridiculously long post. If you don't read I won't be offended. You will only be missing the some of the greatness that is C.S. Lewis.

I make it no secret that Lewis is my favorite author. The words he put to page stir my soul in ways that cannot be matched next to the scripture itself. I recently picked up the book Weight of Glory after I saw that Matt Chandler had listed it as one of his favorites. Let me just say, wow. I'm less than forty pages in and my mind is blown. Check this out. It's well worth the read.

"Glory suggests two ideas to me, of which one seems wicked and the other ridiculous. Either glory means to me fame, or it means luminosity. As for the first, since to be famous means to be better known than other people, the desire for fame appears to me as a competitive passion and therefore of hell rather than heaven. As for the second, who wishes to become a kind of living electric light bulb?

When I began to look into this matter I was shocked to find such different Christians as Milton, Johnson, and Thomas Aquinas taking heavenly glory quite frankly in the sense of fame or good report. But not fame conferred by our fellow creatures--fame with God, approval or (I might say) "appreciation" by God. And then, when I had thought it over, I saw that this view was scriptural; nothing can eliminate from the parable the divine accolade, "Well done, thy good and faithful servant." With that, a good deal of what I had been thinking all my life fell down like a house of cards. I suddenly remembered that no one can enter heaven except as a child; and nothing is so obvious in a child--not in a conceited child, but in a good child-- as its great and undisguised pleasure in being praised. Not only in a child, either, but even in a dog or a horse. Apparently what I had mistaken for humility had, all these years, prevented me from understanding what is in fact the humblest , the most childlike, the most creaturely of pleasure--nay, the specific pleasure of the inferior: the pleasure of a beast before men, a child before its father, a pupil before his teacher, a creature before its Creator. I am not forgetting how horribly this most innocent desire is parodied in our human ambitions, or how very quickly, in my own experience, the lawful pleasure of praise from those whom it was my duty to please turns into the deadly poison of self-admiration. But I thought I could detect a moment--a very, very short moment--before this happened, during which the satisfaction of having pleased those whom I rightly loved and rightly feared was pure. And that is enough to raise our thoughts to what may happen when the redeemed soul, beyond all hope and nearly beyond belief, learns at last that she has pleased Him whom she was created to please. There will be no room for vanity then. She will be free from the miserable illusion that it is her doing. With no taint of what we shall now call self-approval she will most innocently rejoice in the thing that God has made her to be, and the moment which heals her old inferiority complex forever will also drown her pride deeper than Prospero's book. Perfect humility despenses with modesty. If God is satisfied with the work, the work may be satisfied with itself; "it is not for her to bandy compliments with her Sovereign."

I can imagine someone saying that he dislikes my idea of heaven as a place where we are patted on the back. But proud misunderstanding is behind that dislike. In the end that Face which is the delight or the terror of the universe must be turned upon each of us either with one expression or with the other, either conferring glory inexpressible or inflicting shame that can never be cured or disguised. I read in a periodical the other day that the fundamental thing is how we think of God. By God Himself, it is not! How God thinks of us is not only more important, but infinitely more important. Indeed, how we think of Him is of no importance except insofar as it is related to how He thinks of us. It is written that we shall "stand before" Him, shall appear, shall be inspected. The promise of glory is the promise, almost incredible and only possible by the work of Christ, that some of us, that any of us who really chooses, shall actually survive that examination, shall find approval, shall please God. To please God.....to be a real ingredient in the divine happiness.....to be loved by God, not merely pitied, but delighted in as an artist delights in his work or a father in a son--it seems impossible, a weight or burden of glory which our thoughts can hardly sustain. But so it is."

When I read this I was sitting in the coffee shop, coffee in hand, and I wanted to jump and scream in excitement! Yes! It's the last bit that gets me the most, "...to be a real ingredient in the divine happiness..." To make the Creator God smile? Are you serious? That woke something inside of me so pure. It makes me want to live more. To play music with more excitement, to love more deeply. Not for my own fame, but just so I can fulfill my purpose to my Maker. To add to the divine happiness.

Stirring and Robbing

2008-08-21T08:47:00.000-05:00

First of all I must say that I totally stole this post idea from Matt Chandler. He preached a sermon on this idea a ways back (how's that for an Okie statement) and recently went back to this idea in a recent blog post. His blog is one of my favorites and is one of the links on my page. Check it out.

So the subject of this post is what stirs your affections for Christ? What makes you live life to the fullest? On the other side of that coin, what steals from your soul? What things make you weary in body and mind? He then makes a list of those things. My list changes often but for now this what it looks like:

Things that stir my soul for Christ:
- Books by C.S. Lewis
- Rich music with deep lyrics (Patty Griffin, Robbie Seay, Charlie Hall, Bob Dylan...)
- Watching people do things they are passionate about
- A cup of really good coffee soon after I wake in an early morning
- A good meal shared with good friends and family
- Deep conversations
- Playing music
- Listening to Chandler sermons

Things that rob me of Jesus:
- Sleeping all day
- Watching tv or playing on the Internet for hours at a time
- Shallow conversations that go on too long
- Dwelling on my future

So what is it for you? Talk amongst yourselves.

LeRoi Moore: 1961-2008

2008-08-19T23:08:00.000-05:00

LeRoi Moore was the saxophonist for the Dave Matthews Band, without a doubt my favorite band and one of the most influential bands of our generation. The man could play the sax. He, along with every other member of that band had a passion for what he did. Watch them on stage. Just look at the passion and fervor they play with. This goes into a rant that I refuse to divulge now, but we should do what we are passionate about. Check out 4:44 into this video. The man loved what he did.

My Church

2008-08-05T13:42:00.000-05:00

I love my church. For so many reasons, I love my church. My heart was stirred last night and my spirit refreshed as we worked together in the 100+ degree heat to rip apart an old gym that was not being utilized.

I love it because at one point I stopped to get some air that was not filled with sheet-rock dust and just looked around at all the people giving up a Monday night to spend time as a community cleaning out a building for our student ministry. In all honesty, most of the men and women that helped last night don't even have any kids in that ministry. They just know that one facet of loving God is serving, so they did.

I love it because we are working hard at wasting less and being better stewards of what God has blessed us with. This gym was a piece of crap. It was sweltering in the summer and frigid in the winter but our pastors had a vision for it. Our student ministry is literally busting at the seams and instead of starting over from scratch, they looked at the resources available and got creative. In a few weeks the student ministry will have a new facility and the skate church will have a new skate park.

We aren't perfect, in fact we're far from it. What's great is that God continues to show just how imperfect we are and where we need to get better.

The Man. The Myth. The Crazy Goatee.

2008-07-29T19:32:00.000-05:00

This man can write songs and write them well.

My Love

2008-07-19T12:13:00.000-05:00

My lady friend Kristin Chenoweth wrote a song for me. Only she forgot my name and that my coffee shop isn't Starbucks. I forgive her for our's is a pure and gracious love.

Thanks Kristin! I love you too.

My Summer Movie Reviews

2008-07-18T10:22:00.000-05:00

I get excited about stuff. Sometimes ridiculously so. I also tend to over-hype things. My friends realize this and for the most part, I think they've just grown accustomed to it. That said, I also realize that there are those that don't like for things like music and movies to be built up so much because then they can't get excited. They fear that if they hear that a movie is great over and over they will be dissapointed or if they hear that a film is terrible they will be pleasantly surprised. My following movie reviews for two recent films are for those people. Here we go.

"Wanted"
Maybe the best piece of cinema ever. The story was interesting and believable. It stayed completely true to the source material and the performances from the actors will most definitely garner some notice, come award season. Angelina Jolie and Morgan Freeman may have turned in the performances of their lifetimes creating interesting characters with layer upon layer of character development. My vote for the family film of the year.

"The Dark Knight"
Complete crap. Worst movie ever. Christian Bale? Sucked. Aaron Ekhart? Sucked. Morgan Freeman? Sucked. Heath Ledger? Super sucked. The action was totally unoriginal and I was bored the entire film. The plot was terrible, the characters were devoid of any personality. I mean, Michael Caine's character, Alfred, had no point in the movie and Caine could be added to the list of actors above that just coasted through their roles. Heath Ledger phoned in this portrayal of the worst comic book villain ever and ended his short career on a sour not. Don't watch this film. I myself will not be seeing it at least three times in the theaters.

To sum up for those that hate the hype machine:
"Wanted"- Best movie ever.
"The Dark Knight"- Worst movie ever.

Ranting: What Blogging is Really About

2008-07-12T01:47:00.001-05:00

Packing peanuts are the worst invention ever. In the history of man. I'm fairly certain that they are the biggest contributor to global warming and I have it on good authority that they are also responsible for high gas prices. Plus they stick to everything. And they make that really sickening noise when you rub them together.

Long live the little poppy, bubbly sheets of plastic!!!

For the Glory of God

2008-07-01T14:10:00.000-05:00

I've often struggled with why we accept Jesus and follow what he teaches. I've most of the arguments; "Because His way is the best," "Because He restores us," "Because we don't want to go to hell." All of these are valid arguments and I believe they all carry some weight. The teaches of Christ do lead to a life of meaning and beauty. The Holy Spirit absolutely restores and makes new all things. Hell is a terrible place and none really want to go there. The problem is, all of these seemed to point towards the individual.

If you look at scripture, New Testament and Old, It seems that everything is done to bring glory back to God. He gives us full life in Christ so we can thank Him and praise Him. He repairs our lives so we can thank Him. He takes away addiction and pride so we can look more clearly on Him. He makes a way to final redemption through Christ so we can glorify Him.

N.T. Wright puts it far more eloquently,

"We should recall that the use of the word heaven to denote the ultimate goal of the redeemed, though of course hugely popularized by medieval and subsequent piety, is severely misleading and does not begin to do justice to the Christian hope. I am repeatedly frustrated by how hard it is to get this point through the thick wall of traditional thought and language that most Christians put up. The ultimate destination is not "going to heaven when you die" but being bodily raised into the transformed glorious likeness of Jesus Christ. (Though the point of all this is not, of course, merely our own happy future, important though that is, but the glory of God as we come full to reflect His image.)"

N. T. Wright -Surprised by Hope

Utter Crap

2008-06-22T22:42:00.001-05:00

I own far too much stuff. This is a revelation that I think everyone goes through upon moving. My current roommate liquidated and pretty much inspired me to do the same.

What this means for me is throwing away encouragement notes from Falls Creek and Super Summer days gone by (yes, I'm that guy that took those seriously and poured my soul into a colored piece of paper and kept every "Hope you have a great summer!").

It also means all the journals and notebooks full of notes from my freshman Survey of American History class will be taking a trip to the Ville to reside with the parents.

Salvation Army is getting a pretty sizable donation of tee shirts and dress shirts that fit fellows a bit on the chubby side.

Some comics will go into storage. Air tight of course. The classics will stay out for frequent reading.

It seems the one thing I can't part with are my books. I'm pretty sure there is a Seinfeld episode that goes into great lengths about people and their need to surround themselves with books, so I'll just refer back to that. Watch it. Its funny.

By Wednesday I hope to be moved. Wish me luck. It's quite an adventure.

Bed

2008-06-16T11:16:00.000-05:00

My bed is one of the most uncomfortable to ever grace a bedroom. I can literally feel the individual springs force through top. The other night I rolled over and was awakened when a spring almost poked through and scraped me. Yeah, it's a crappy bed.

I spent last weekend leading worship at Camp Wow. Very cool camp if you ever get to go. The staff that works there is unbelievably cool and have some of the biggest servants' hearts ever. We stayed in the lodge and had a great time. The bed I slept in that weekend was a queen size with no visible springs, nor could I feel the springs. I slept terribly. I mean absolutely horrible.

When I go back to Holdenville my bed is not the most comfortable, but it should be an improvement over the exposed spring resting place in my apartment. Again, sleep does not come come easy.

There is something about being at home. As crappy as our Rolling Ghettos apartment is, its still home. As soon as my head hits the pillow I'm out. Every night.

The Ordinary.

2008-06-05T15:44:00.000-05:00

One of my very good friends called me a couple of nights ago to catch up on life and such. He and his wife moved a couple of years ago from Ada to Texas so we don't get to chit chat the way we did.

At the point where the conversation began to slow and you almost get to that point of, "Man it was good to hear from you..." at the close of the phone call he says, "Hey did I tell you about the monastery I was at a for a week?" My natural response, "No. But you must."

He proceeded to tell me about this beautiful place in New Mexico (who knew monks were so technologically advanced?) and his time spent there in the middle of no where in the middle of New Mexico. Redundant, I know.

The day begins at 4 a.m. with the eucharist and the day is framed in prayer and work. At 7:30 every evening silence is kept until the morning. The first thing they say in the morning is praise to God and the last thing they say at night is praise to God. Wow.

He then told me about the celebration of sunrise. White robes are worn and as the sun breaks the horizon and spills light across the darkness, they declare Jesus' victory over darkness and death and his resurrection to life. Again, wow.

My friend told me about this trip and I was expecting him to bring some deep theology back to the discussion but all he said was, "Jared, you do this work and you pray these prayers and you find God in the ordinary." Once more, wow.

Isn't it Ironic? Don't You Think?

2008-06-05T15:42:00.000-05:00

I misspelled the word "genius" in my last post. Define irony.......

N.T. Wright= Genious

2008-05-29T14:17:00.000-05:00

N.T. Wright is quickly becoming one of my favorite authors. This theologian's got it going on! I'm reading his book, Surprised by Hope, and do a lot of head shaking in amazement at his insight into scripture.

The aforementioned book is his response, essentially, to end-times theology and some works of fiction that have made the rounds in Christian book circles recently. Basically he says, because of many, many factors, theology has gotten a bit askew and instead of Heaven being a far off existence it is instead very near us and in the final resurrection Heaven will come crashing into earth in restoration. That's a very short clip. Read the book to do this doctrine justice. Please.

The above wasn't what I planned on writing, but so goes thought. I'm a bit of a meaderer. And I think I just made up a word. Awesome.

The Best Food Ever. Period.

2008-05-28T13:11:00.000-05:00

My favorite food is cereal. Easily. I don't know that anything tastes as good as a bowl of Frosted Mini Spooners eaten like a child with milk dripping straight off chin. Its a beautiful thing.

There are so many good things about cereal. The initial bites with the freshly poured milk, situating the cereal in a strategic fashion to gain optimum sugar distribution, the cereal juice left at the bottom of the bowl. Oh the beauty of it all!

It fits your moods. What other food does that? Want to feel like a grown up? Grab you a bowl of Corn Flakes, no sugar added of course. Feeling child-like? Snag up a bowl of Cinnamon Toasters.

You may notice a trend with the names of these cereals. I'm all about buying in bulk. As Garrett says, I buy my cereal in feed sacks. Toss it over my shoulder and go. Malt-O-Meal cereal. Serving the world's middle class since 1978. Or some date like it.

Amazing Music. Amazing Price.

2008-05-22T11:27:00.000-05:00

If you don't already have it get this album now. "The Village Sessions" by John Mayer. Its just 4.99 on iTunes and you get a twenty minute video that's basically a short documentary on how the song "In Repair" was written over the course of a day.

I will warn you, if you are an aspiring songwriter watch with caution. This video will make you want to absolutely die. In a good way. Inspiration, oh how bittersweet a friend you are....

"Give Yourself Away." The Robbie Seay Band. Amazing guys. Amazing music. Me using the adjective amazing far too often. All things in this paragraph are true.

Pick up this album! I can't stress this enough! Every track is solid and it's 7.99 on iTunes. Download it, listen to the whole thing through, then put "New Day" and "Shine Your Light" on repeat and thank me later.

2008-05-21T11:22:00.000-05:00

Well I've entered the blogging world. I feel like one of the cool kids now. Although can you really be a cool kid when it comes to anything computer oriented? I'll let you decide.

The reason I've thrown my hat into the ring is my love for writing. Usually my thoughts stay in my journal (manly word for diary) and pretty much stay to myself. The only problem with this is it keeps me accountable to no one. I can write what I want with no repercussion. I realize that very few people outside of my family will read this (hi Mom) but still, I think putting some of my thoughts on the interwebs will help in dealing with life and living as transparent a life as possible.

So here it is. My thoughts on life. Most are pretty dumb. If you read this we'll all assume you were bored and no one worth talking to was on Facebook chat. That's okay read away and enjoy. Or don't. Do what you will.